ok stephanie, i'm doing it, i've committed, i accepted the terms and paid my dues....now i have to do it.

i think the older i get, the more commitment phobic i become. maybe this is just because i have always been increadibly involved in everything...even in college. i know what it is like to do everything, but not really do anything well.

i haven't committed to anything this semester. part of this is the fear that something will mess up my study time, and part of this is the fear that once i start committing to something, i will start committing to everything and continue in the cycle of doing everything, but not doing anything well.

i like to put my all in what i do and when my all isnt good enough because it is streached out too thin, i become discouraged, and i guess, commitment phobic.

i need to find balance.

maybe this is the first step in finding that balance. i am a little concerned that training for this thing will cut into my study time, but honestly, i am going to need some sort of mental break and exercise does this well.

so there ya go, hold me to it, i'm committing